Can we talk?
I want to start this article by giving you a warning. Most of you who read this will not like or agree with my opinion.
Now since that is out of the way, let me say this: The conviction and sentencing of Ray Rice by social media, TMZ and ESPN was one of the most gruesome, horrifying debacles I have ever seen in my lifetime.
But you know what was worse? The excruciating pain that Janay Rice was forced to feel as she re-lived a low point in her relationship with the man she loves over and over and over again. It was a demoralizing, dreadful and despicable ordeal which we should all be ashamed of.
Obviously, without question, what Rice did inside of a casino elevator on that fateful February night was wrong. President Obama said it best when he said, “hitting a woman is not something a real man does.”
But since when did it become the public’s job to determine how a man and a woman’s private problems should be solved? Why do you think you have a right to be involved in Ray and Janay Rice’s marriage?
Many observers of the situation are furious with NFL commissioner Roger Goodell because he only dished out a 2-game suspension. While I agree that the suspension could’ve been longer, based on the facts at hand, a 2-game suspension was the only thing that made sense.
The NFL had previously never set a precedent for how long a player was supposed to be suspended after being involved with a domestic violence dispute (Since then, the league has instituted a 6-game ban for the first offense and a lifetime ban for the second offense).
The prosecutor in Rice’s case accepted him into an intervention program which would require him to seek counseling and clear him of his charges in six months. And to top it all off according to SI’s Peter King, Janay Rice pleaded with the commissioner in a “moving and apparently convincing case” that this was a “one-time event.”
If Rice’s prosecutor and his wife were satisfied that he understood how detrimental his actions were, isn’t that all that matters?
The public’s outrage towards Ray Rice reached its tipping point on Monday when video of Ray Rice knocking out his wife was released by TMZ. On Sunday September 7th before the video was leaked, Ray Rice knocked out his wife in an elevator just as on Monday September 8th after the video leaked, Ray Rice knocked out his wife in an elevator. None of the facts in the situation changed.
The only difference is that for the first time we saw what actually happened. My question to everyone who is outraged is if you’re so passionate about Ray Rice, who avoided trial and settled his differences with his wife; where is your passion about Greg Hardy, a Panthers defensive end who was FOUND GUILTY of assaulting his former girlfriend and threatened to KILL HER.
Where is your passion about Ray McDonald, a 49ers defensive lineman who was arrested and charged with felony domestic violence after allegedly beating up his pregnant fiancé? By the way, in McDonald’s case, this is the second time police have been involved in a domestic dispute between him and his fiancé.
But since we don’t have video of either incident, I guess they can stay in the league and continue to play without consequence. None of the analysts on television will call for them to be banned from the league because it’s not the trendy thing to do. How hypocritical and pathetic.
The most important question here though is as the public made Ray Rice a scapegoat for domestic violence, how many people thought of Janay Rice?
How many people thought that by continuously bringing up this subject you’re hurting Janay more than you’re helping? How many people realized that taking away Ray Rice’s income changes their financial situation, their ability to help and support their family and the dynamics of their marriage?
It’s sad that the public chose to ruin a man’s career because they were thinking with their hearts and not with their brains.
Of course what Ray Rice did was wrong and pathetic. Of course as a father, a brother or a son; you should be moved in some way after seeing that video because you would never want something like that to happen to a woman you love.
But the beauty of the United States of America is that everyone is treated fairly and given their due process. Once a punishment has been served, no matter what evidence is presented afterwards, that individual gets a second chance at proving that they are indeed a worthy and valuable citizen of society.
Instead, everyone from social media to TMZ to ESPN etc. has demonized Ray Rice to the point that they’ve built a demon. Rice may have avoided jail but the public has trapped him in a prison of guilt which could forever result in a lifetime of bitterness and unhappiness. If you don’t believe me, just look at Chris Brown.
Once again I’ll ask, why do you think you have a right to be involved in Ray and Janay Rice’s marriage?
Photos courtesy of Google Images
Pulsefeedz 
I agree with you and feel the same way
Well said.
Well said. I agree and would welcome Ray back to the Ravens with open arms.
WOW it is amazing how people are in anyway saying anything to be on Ray Rice’s side. People say public hanging or look at the other idiots that have pending cases or you are ruining his marriage. I like this one the best if it was not for this video nobody would be worrying about this. Get a grip, the crazy thing is if it were not for this video Ray Rice would have dragged his fiance back to the hotel room and nobody would know anything about what happened. Would Janey be better off? Would that be better? I don’t get people this guy just straight up knocked a girl out not just any girl his fiance. What the hell is wrong with you people? If the NFL and the Ravens seen this and agreed with a 2 game suspension who ever made that decision should be ashamed of themselves. As soon as the 2 game suspension came out everyone was outraged and could not believe it. It was not just the video. A lot of women that get beat stay in the relationship and are scared to leave. That is a fact. Ray Rice got what he deserved. Ray and Janay should not be worried about his job. They should worry about their marriage. Ray take a year off and fix yourself. WOW PEOPLE!!!
Is it out business to know what happened in the first place? As far as you saying him and his wife should not worry about his job is ridiculous, but just concentrate on their marriage??? I’m sorry but I’ve been married a decade and financial stability is an important factor when concentrating on a marriage. I know you will probably say he has millions, but he probably lives according to his paycheck. As far as woman stay because they are scared is a fact, but maybe it’s not her fact. Maybe her facts are it was a horrible isolated event, maybe they prayed about it and she decided if God forgives why can’t I. Every time I have issues I wish I could take a year off and not worry bout income and fix myself.
lol. get a life.
So what you are saying is that if a man beats a woman and no one knows about it, it is OK, therefore, if someone does find out about it it is OK as well? Are you nuts! This woman has been so badly abused by Ray and probably other men that she is incapable of defending herself. Thank God for public media who has brought the truth to light. The man is sick, the woman is sicker and something needs to be done about it. Unless of course we want to wait until he does permanent damage to her or someone else. Oh yah, if nobody finds out, it will be ok. Maybe you need some help.
i agree! what is wrong with these other people??? its not acceptable to hit a woman, never mind doing it so hard you knock her out!! i hope their marriage IS ruined…it may end up saving her life…next time he may hit her & knock her into a table & kill her
But it’s acceptable to hit a man? Or It’s unacceptable for a man to fight back?
As a man, I can tell you, you restrain a woman if she is hitting you, under NO circumstances hit a woman. Anyone condoning this is as stupid as the wife beater. That punch knocked out Janay. Do you think she had a chance to knock him out?
Ok, obviously I didn’t realize I was on my wifes page, lol.
I think he’s saying if you are this outraged about what Rice did, you should be even more outraged about what Hardy and McDonald did. Don’t just go with what public opinion is telling you to do, hop fully on board and be more disgusted with the guy who threatened to kill his wife and with the guy who beat up his pregnant wife (multiple times). Of course, I could’ve read into it wrong and you could be right.
Nah what he’s really saying here is “Because Ray didn’t get convicted and it happened privately, you should not only not care but you should stay the fuck out of Ray’s business”. Which is a foolhardy argument at best.
Why respond if you don get the point of the article? Where were you when others did the same to their wife and worse? Dont pretend to be this champion against domestic abuse now. You dont even care about Janay Rice. You just want to see a public hanging of a man with prevention of it happening again. You are silly. Learn to read pass the headlines for change.
That misses the point of the article entirely. First, the writer states “Obviously, without question, what Rice did inside of a casino elevator on that fateful February night was wrong”. Furthermore, the writer goes on to criticize the NFL for allowing players to play even though there hasn’t been any video of domestic violence! This article in no way seeks to undermine the crime of domestic violence, and you missed the point. You are justifying the public ridicule of a a couple’s personal matters without personally knowing them or their relationship. How many conversations have you had with either Ray or Janay? Did you sit in the courtroom? Have you read every article about their relationship? If so, then maybe you should publish your own article. The people who set the charges and made the settlements were the professionally trained lawyers who had been fully invested in this case since day 1, not the average person who only knows a few horrific seconds of an otherwise (apparently) strong marriage. I am in no way condoning the actions of Ray Rice nor am I saying what should be done. I don’t know enough about them to make that decision, and neither do the majority of people who saw that video. Thats what the article is about, don’t jump straight to conclusions in a situation you have no business being involved in, nor the knowledge to come to a reasonable decision. Public shaming is barbaric and no matter how hard ray rice tries to remedy the situation he can never recover. Nor can his wife who has to live day in and day out with this video defining her for the rest of the world. And don’t forget their daughter who has to grow up knowing that her mom and dad had this altercation and ruined their lives.
If you read the article again that’s not what he said…. Please read and understand what you are reading.
Damn that is the most Misogynistic comment I’ve ever seen. Why don’t you just say women are inferior and that they need to be defended from men at all cost
I agree with SP…..and frankly, she should not have married him, as a person from Baltimore, we have enough crime in our city, we don’t need it on the football field….and as for the NFL, perhaps Mr. Goodell needs to go as well. When you are in the public eye, try acting like a decent human being instead of a woman beater. Enough said, what the Ravens and what the NFL did was great, in my opinion. Maybe he can get a job at a gas station.
And if he doesn’t…. his problems become OUR problems.
I think he can come back from this.
You are a dumba**… that is not what was said at any point in this article. Work on your comprehension skills
Good one.
So my question would be this…we know what he did was wrong…that’s understood…but why focus on this one incident of domestic violence when there are plenty of other domestic violence cases happening? Is it because they aren’t as financially stable as Ray Rice WAS? Or is it the fact that they aren’t as well known by the media as he was? Either way you look at it…if you’re a high profile, or low profile couple, domestic violence is still wrong.
Oh…and as the icing on the cake…so there’s a movie coming out called “No Good Deed” starring Idris Elba, and Taraji P. Henson. I bet you, that the ones that are disgusted and apalled by this incident, will go PAY to see this movie, which basically displays the same thing that has happened to Janay Rice. So in other words, and to end here…we can be just so gung ho about demonizing Ray Rice because of what he done…but yet we can be the same people who will go to PAY TO SEE A MOVIE depicting the same thing that you’re against?
Hmm…
No not what was said at all. The opinion is saying that neither is ok. And all three are just as bad. Except the one found guilty and the other which has happened twice is not being referenced equally. That’s a problem
Well said
“It’s sad that the public chose to ruin a man’s career because they were thinking with their hearts and not with their brains.”
are you out of your mind? i dont remember the public knocking his fiance out. oh thats right bc it was ray rice, and its ray rice who is suffering for his actions. his wife is no doubt going to be hit again and this is, of course, not the first time. if she stays with him thats on her. why are people feeling sorry for this man? he has plenty of money and the nfl still owes him so theyll be fine. also, lets be honest, he will be back. its unfortunate but true. seen any players who murdered dogs, escaped murder charges or other domestic abuse charges playing lately? so to the weirdo who said he would welcome rice back with open arms, no worries, you wont have to wait too long.
I agree with denise too and it sad to think that he will be back. The person who wrote this is nuts….they need to change the rules with the nfl….if I want to watch thugs running up and down a field with a football, I might as well go down to Baltimore City and hope not to get shot.
DLW that’s real talk.
I hope his ass does come back. One incident doesn’t make an episode. And we don’t know the dynamics of their relationship prior to this video being shown.
I feel you
Just curious…has anyone asked this question?
If we were to ask this right now, “Janay, at this very moment, which situation of abuse is worse….having one domestic dispute with your husband in which he obviously physically abused you OR having the entire world force you to relive the entire situation through social, traditional and rich media (video, audio) and losing your entire livelihood because of it? Which is worse Janay? Abuse by your husband or abuse by the public and media?” What do you think she would say?
I think my main point here is that, of course we all agree that Ray should never have hit her and perhaps deserved more punishment than he received, however, isn’t just as abusive to drag her and her family through the torment of having to relive the entire situation AND now punish not only Ray, but her entire family as well by taking her livelihood away from her?
How is any of this helpful to Janay and their process of healing if society is now going to punish both of them, while at the same time, saying, we are trying to protect Janay and other women from domestic abuse? Isn’t this hurting her more than helping her and doesn’t THAT automatically make society’s campaign to help her a hypocrisy in itself?
Just something to think about. Thanks
That’s a question I would ask the people who provided that footage, and the TMZ executives. Valid argument though.
Maybe she’ll get a clue and leave the man who insists on abusing her. Maybe the pain she is being forced to relive will remind her that she shouldn’t have to live it in the first place.
That’s aa question that should be asked to the people who run TMZ, and whoever sold them that video.
Right on David
“… Why do you think you have a right to be involved in Ray and Janay Rice’s marriage?”
Ray Rice is a celebrity. He made $25 million dollars in the last two seasons to catch a ball and run with it. As the NFL pays for his contracts, and the fans pay for tickets, concessions, official gear, etc. that allow the NFL to continue operating, I feel that they have a right to know everything. I don’t care whether or not he plays again. There are children that see what he did and, now, those children have a better understanding of the fact that you can’t walk away smiling and cashing your paychecks after committing a violent crime.
You’re attempting to blame the public as a whole? Ray Rice’s fans didn’t crowd into an elevator and punch his fiancé in the face, subsequently knocking her out. His fans didn’t drag her unconscious body out of an elevator.
Hopefully the Rices didn’t spend all those millions within the last two years because Ray Ray might need to get a job, and I’m not about to feel sorry for him. Let me go start punching my significant others in the face and see where I end up. I can guarantee you it won’t be in the comfort of my own home with that much money in the bank.
Lastly, let me say that my opinion isn’t the best. It is just my own. I care very little about sports or their celebrities, in general. But, the truth is that many children are taught to worship these guys by their parents, who worshiped generations of sportsmen before them. We cannot let our kids think that it is fine to act like an animal or, worse yet, think that we can act like idiots and get away with it. This behavior is tolerated far, too often, and it is NOT okay.
END
You are wrong. Where were you when he played football in high school? or college? Did you drive him to the practices? Did you coach him how to play the game? You play for the ticket to be entertained by the sport. NOT to peek into someones life. Get a grip.
I agree that we dont have the right to peek in someone’s personal life. Unfortunately this isn’t a case of us nosey fans prying into his life. He wasn’t behind the closed doors of his house or other private quarters, he did this in a casino elevator where there was a camera.
Emmanuel – that’s exactly what I was saying on my facebook post this morning, the NFL should be setting a good examples for the children who wear their jerseys and look up to this guy….agree 100%
Emmanuel…I don’t think that anyone is saying that they condone what Ray Rice did in anyway. I read this article from the perspective that we, as a public, need to also take responsibility of our own actions and how they are affecting the outcome of their relationship as well as her ability to move forward from this and heal should she choose to heal with or without her husband. That part is not for the public to decide but we (and the media who is the actual source of all of the publicity this is now receiving) are taking it upon ourselves to play them like puppets. Put yourself in her shoes and assume you are a smart enough woman who deserves the respect of being capable of making decisions that you feel would be best for you and your family to be “forced” into a dark hole of despair because everyone know the dirty details of, what might be a, “one off incident”. We don’t know all the facts…that’s the point…so for us to prosecute Ray AND Janay for their decisions is not completely fair.
What do you think?
Well said Emmanuel. I think people are missing that point. I dont think this about whether or nor we have the rights to pry into someone’s private life because we dont. This is about right and wrong, and Ray Ray was dead wrong. I hope that dude does get his shit together and prosper.
“Like” your comment!
He can always get a job with the Post Office!
I agree, but don’t you think there should be continuity in the punishment within the NFL? They decided on a punishment and carried it out (2 game suspension). They then instituted new rules to cover future incidents and in Mr. Rice’s case they didn’t even follow their own rule. (1st offense 6 game suspension, 2nd offense indefinite suspension) Ray was a first time offense. At worst he should have had a 6 game suspension not indefinite. There are many players guilty of the same offense or worse and they are still playing. Continuity is the issue. We all agree that hitting a woman is wrong.
Can I add one more thing to my comment that I think is important to think about….the situation with her husband is bearably manageable, the situation with the public and her livelihood is not. Everyone has now guaranteed her a lifetime of therapy and now EVERYONE, including me for engaging in this conversation and watching and listening to what happened, has blood on our hands. Any thoughts on this?
I would post this comment on ESPNs, or TMZs site since they are the source of this BS.
I believe what Ray did was wrong and should receive some form of punishment however he should also be given a second chance . Most people have jumped on this bandwagon where he should banned for life and that’s total BS. Why not let him and his family deal with this in private.
He deserves the right to deal with this in a private manner. It’s too bad that the world we created doesn’t always work that way.
David, I agree with you. Engaging in these online forums isn’t helping. It fuels the flame. It is our own ego wanting to say, “Listen to meeeee!” But, on the interwebs, you have that option.
Just for some information the Greg Hardy and the Ray McDonald situations are not finished in court yet so they haven’t been found guilty. The nfl said they are waiting for a courts decision before making their own. Just incase you werent aware. Also I that when you become a public figure your private life becomes open. Do I agree no, but those are the consequences. But the public didn’t ruin his career, he did. We all make choices and must live by them. He decided to hit his wife which resulted in his financial loss and bad public image. I don’t feel bad at all. Here’s a scenario, say someone who works for you beats his wife and everyone in the office knows this…..your saying you will still keep him? Let’s take a different angle since u talk about private life. Shouldn’t anyone who smoke weed in there private life not be affected as well? Josh Gordon got suspended for a year for smoking weed. Did he hurt anyone? No but he smoked weed. Should he be punished for a year?
Carol, it should be the same for anybody who does any wrong. Michael Vick murdered innocent animals with his bare hands, did jail time, and got a contract. Although I thoroughly dislike that fact, it would be in the NFL’s best interest to really put together a thorough policy for players who have committed crimes. Let’s not just make it a, “Eh? Well? He’s a good player and he’ll make us money.” thing.
For goodness’ sake. Between Ray Lewis, Ray Rice, Michael Mick, and Ben Roethlisberger, it’s almost like the NFL is becoming the number one provider of jobs for ex-convicts.
HE did this to himself… It just happened to be caught on tape for the public to see! You and whom ever may have a option on this matter, but he as a well known celebrity should have shown more self control. Hitting a woman is never okay. I don’t care what anyone says.
Just look at Janey’s face in the picture above. That is the face of an abused woman. That, in my opinion, wasn’t the first time he hit her and it won’t be the last unless she gets out soon. Hopefully she will see that she needs to make herself safe if not for her own sake certainly for her daughter.
Anne…I have to take exception to, what I feel, is an ignorant comment such as “just look at Janay’s face in the picture above.” Are all pictures of people’s faces have somesort of 100% guaranteed accuracy of what kind of person they are and what they are feeling? If that’s the case then courts should just use pictures of people’s expressions all the time to determine the truth and all those pictures of happy looking people because they smile in the picture should mean they are all happy people. C’mon. You know that isn’t the case and you can’t just say “Oh look at that picture…it tells the whole truth of the story.”
Emmanuel…I think one of the fundamental conflicts with the “we fuel the fire” philosophies and social media is that over time, it’s been proven that the most efficient process in developing knowledge is communication whether that is debating or discussing knowledge and passing that on so as much as we are “fueling the fire” which I obviously agree with, isn’t it, on some level, necessary for mankind to continue to move forward and learn? Not trying to turn this into an evolutionary debate but just a thought. And I guess my main point is that perhaps this situation is exactly the reason many organizations and investigations keep thing PRIVATE until they are able to make decisions and conclude things before the court of public opinion gets its hands on it so perhaps what we need to learn from this is that some situations are better handled without the court of public opinion getting involved.
Call me David..lol you are so righ! !!!!!
I completely disagree!! The person who wrote this article is an idiot! Here is why: first, the comment ‘President Obama said it best when he said, “hitting a woman is not something a real man does.”’ is complete BS, ‘hitting a woman is what a CRIMINAL does!! Second, using the argument and comparison to Greg Hardy and Ray McDonald is STUPID! That’s like saying, ‘hey they got away with murder, its not fair that I don’t get away with it too’ and yes they both need to go too! Third, blaming the public for making it worse on Janay and how it’s going to negatively effect their lives is a crock of crap, ANY negative reproductions are 100% on Ray Rice! Fourth, the ‘due process’ argument is crap as well, when you get HIGHLY preferential treatment by the legal system where the prosecutor and judge are going to face removal from their position, it’s equivalent to paying off a judge or jury! You damn sure don’t get a free pass and you should be treated to a FAIR evaluation by a judge or jury and only then does ‘due process’ come into play! The only thing that could have saved Ray Rice and Janay was to be completely honest from the very beginning, not use his NFL status to avoid fair prosecution and show attrition IMMEDIATELY!!
Verbal abuse calling people out of their name because they exercise freed of speech!!!!!you should be fired!!!!!!
Yes Ray RIce commited a awful act, but we all knew he hit her, he admitted to it but just becuase there is a video why all of a sudden is he the worst man in America. NFL has had players who commited many crimes, dog fighting, domestic abuse and sexual assualts but Rice is indefinetly suspended, whereas Big Ben the rapist is still playing, Terrell Suggs who had several domestic violence issues is still playing. The media has made this a issue way bigger then it needed to be. The Rice family was working on the issue and the media has invaded their privacy and cost them their future. There is NO ONE on the planet that has NEVER made a mistake, I could see if this was a ongoing issue but it wasn’t it appeared to be a one time thing with liquor involved.
Unless you’re GOD no one has the right to judge and even if you are judging look in your own backyard to see how perfect you are.
Everything in this situation could have been handled better. The video from inside the elevator should have been released but not publicly. Of course, that’s what you get with a casino on the verge of bankruptcy and a society that allows sites like TMZ to pay the big bucks for things like this. We, the public did not need to see the video, but I think the Ravens and the NFL should have seen it, probably a long time ago. Unfortunately, before this video came out, it was difficult to say anything for sure. Yes, we all saw him dragging her out of the elevator but what led to that, we didn’t really know. It’s easy to say he hit her but why? Did he feel he needed to defend himself for some reason? Did he just decide to hit her out of the blue? The truth of that is, we didn’t really know. His actions, now that we’ve seen them, were deplorable and disgusting but who are you to put him in this box of your “standard” domestic abuse perpetrators? Why are you so certain he is going to do it again or has done it before? Why is she all of a sudden this chronically abuse woman who has been so psychologically that she rationalizes the abuse she apparently endures on a regular basis? Sure, these things might be true in some cases, probably even most cases of domestic abuse but you are not entitled to label the situation how you see fit because you think you understand any of this. Quite frankly, none of this is any of my business but what is my business is his position of leadership and as a role model in the communities I grew up in. I’m glad he was removed from that position for the time being. If he comes back in the future after a period of reform, then so be it. If he doesn’t, whatever. The decision the NFL and the Baltimore Ravens bigwigs made, whether intentional or not, was one of sending a message to those who saw the video that domestic abuse is NOT okay. The message has to start somewhere and this very public case with a video to go along with it was a good place for that. You’re right that other people do similar and sometimes seemingly worse things but the way we ignore that is a problem in every single case. If we keep saying “well you didn’t punish X so you can’t do this to Y” then we will continue a cycle of ignoring things because we feel some false entitlement to protect the well-being of this person you don’t even really know, no matter what. The point here is that the video should not be necessary but the way we turn a deaf ear to these things right now makes it necessary. Not a single person here gave a shit about the other players mentioned above until now and THAT is the problem here.
Sorry but this is one of the dumbest opinion pieces I’ve ever read. The title states how stupid it is….WE (the public) ruined his marriage? How come the punk that punched his wife doesn’t get the blame for ruining his marriage?? The reason this one is getting so much attention is because people are actually seeing what domestic violence looks like. We sort of got a glimpse with the Rihanna/Chris Brown beating but that was the aftermath so people eventually got the image out of their head. This was the actual punch…and I think people who hear “domestic violence’ finally went “holy sh*t!” These people are in a profession in the public eye and there are kids who admire them and look up to them. Why has our standard for those in the public spotlight gone so low that we will give a pass to someone for knocking out his wife just once? How about if he kills her…..does he still get to play – he only killed one wife after all? We’ve seen that torturing animals and raping women get a pass so what is it that would actually make someone go “hmmmm you know that’s just a sh*tty person – maybe we shouldn’t have them on TV every week and kids walking around in their jerseys?” Raping a child? Would that do it? I’m just baffled…and this applies to anyone who goes down a path in the public eye – politicians, actors, athletes, etc. If you can’t handle being a decent person then exit stage right. Just because this woman has such low self worth that she would say “oh it’s OK” doesn’t mean everyone else should think it is OK. It is NOT OK. And why are people assuming this is the first time he’s hit her? His reaction of just standing there while she is laid out and then half dragging her ass off the elevator indicates maybe it’s not his first time doing something like this. I would think the normal response from someone knocking someone out is “oh sh*t!” and dropping to their knees to try to help the person and see what’s wrong.
I don’t think she thought it was ok, she thought about all that football money. She’s a damn idiot.
That’s right Misty….that’s all she was thinking about was the money, I don’t feel sorry for this couple, not at all…..when you are in the public eye, behave yourself and as for the NFL, get rid of Roger Goodell for clearly, he’s an ass and doesn’t know how best to handle his business which is the game of football. What they should do is get rid of all the low lifes and thugs and start hiring decent men who live decent lives who want to play football…hell, I can’t even afford to go to a game because I don’t make that kind of money so I don’t feel sorry for this couple at all. Good riddance Ray Rice. Baltimore does not need another low life, we have enough in the inner city and hell, the governor won’t even help let alone the public and we should feel sorry for these people? Let’s focus on the poor of Baltimore City instead of the man who made millions and just lost it. Let’s just hope this situation has given a voice to domestic violences
Agreed
Well said.
Very much personal opinion. Are you completely aware of what you are doing when you are drinking? We don’t know their level of sobriety but it is fact they were both drinking. Every person reacts differently in a situation. Now, he could have done it before, or he could have had that “oh my god, what have I done” thought go through his head.
Personally, I don’t care and it is none of my business, regardless of his celebrity status. There is no law that says since you are a celebrity I must know every detail of your personal life. I pay the money to be entertained by the specific category of entertainment you provide. That money does not give me the right to see the casino videos or know every detail of your personal life.
If you are concerned about him being a role model, educate your children. If your child loves Ray Rice, now is when you stop him/her from being allowed to do anything that promotes Ray Rice and you have a candid discussion with your child about what he did and why it is wrong. The media industry does not educate and raise my child, I do. I talk with my children and do the best I can to help them discern right from wrong.
All else aside, abuse is horrible. I’ve dealt with it and my wife has dealt with it. I don’t wish that experience on anybody. But, you never know the situation, and TMZ may provide a video, but it doesn’t give you anything else but a visual que of that immediate moment. I’m a man that has been verbally and physically abused by a woman. I put up with it for months before I got out of it. I was fortunate though in my snapping moment that I was not drinking or otherwise incapable of stopping myself from completing the punch when I raised my hand. I put my hand down, walked out, and never looked back. Never assume that you understand what is going in when all you hear or see is what the media televizes.
he made a choice to put his personal life in the media when he became an NFL player. unfortunately, she made that choice as well by marrying him. end of story.
agree lisa erdman, agree 100%
Ditto.
I do not agree with this. He chose to make a living playing football. The media part and the rabid fans are a byproduct of his choice to make a living playing football. It is not a choice to have the media follow you around and scrutinize every personal move you make if you become a football player. It’s not fair to link everything together that way. If this was a janitor, no one would even know he was beating his wife because people don’t want to watch and cheer for janitors sweeping floors. Again, it’s fueled by the public and now the public feels they have the obligation to make the judgements.
In response to this, “But since when did it become the public’s job to determine how a man and a woman’s private problems should be solved? Why do you think you have a right to be involved in Ray and Janay Rice’s marriage?” It’s a legal fact that it is the public’s job to solve people’s private problems when they include crimes against the state (ex assault, battery, domestic violence). Especially when committed in a public place (ex public elevator)
LawStudent….ummmm…I’m assuming you are talking about a jury who decides the fate of a defendant in specific cases? If so, are you actually comparing that to this situation where every person in world has been given a unregulated platform to express their opinions and submit their verdicts because I don’t think it’s a fact that it’s the publics job to solve people’s private problems in ways such as this, is it?
David, what you are missing is that this is not a private problem. When a crime is committed, it is committed against all of society. The “state” can bring charges for many crimes, even if the person or property owner chooses not to.
This is separate from his legal proceeding. The public can choose to do whatever it wants-it’s not bound by a trial or jury decision.
I must ask-why do you care that the NFL finally stood up against domestic violence? Do you hit your wife and worry that this sets a precedent? If you don’t, why are you mad that someone is being punished for a heinous crime?
Good response. I didn’t think about it from that perspective
I was responding to you Law Student. Keep up the good owrk.
Ya know…if he just wouldn’t have hit his wife, none of this would be happening but ya know….it’s everyone else’s fault.
Word
Excellent BALANCED article.
All I have to say is that if you put your business out in the streets don’t be surprised when the streets start talking.
My thoughts exactly
So, do you agree with Mayweather here: http://www.facebook.com/l.php?u=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.tmz.com%2Fvideos%2F0_4dcllnrc&h=ZAQEbsllx
LOL, @nappynikki, I just read an article on Mayweather’s response. It’s interesting how he’s on Ray’s side. I wonder why?
Lol right! If course he is on his side lol two peas in a pod
Of*
I personally think it’s a damn shame that he hit her. I also think it’s a damn shame she married him after. As far as I’m concerned, any future ass kickings she may receive she deserves. She should have ran when she had the chance. Now she’s just another statistic. This article is a load of crap possibly written by someone who gets their ass beat regularly by the man they love. Shame on you.
LMAO!!!!!!
Lmaooo
We are a punitive-minded people and self-righteous judgement of others is our national pastime.
‘Christian’ America would do well to follow the spirit of the Gospels as best expressed by Edward Wallis Hoch…
“There is so much good in the worst of us,
And so much bad in the best of us,
That it hardly behooves any of us
To talk about the rest of us.”
In other words, “Judge not, lest ye be judged.”
Are you serious? I am a Christian and am so offended by what you just wrote, in this context. Nowhere does the Bible suggest that someone cannot be punished for committing wrongdoings. Can they ask for forgiveness? Yes. Can they still be punished? Of course.
Besides, did I miss where Ray Rice apologized? To the best of my knowledge, he hasn’t. To get forgiveness, you have to ASK for it.
Thank you for pointing out one of many Biblical contradictions.
Ray Rice is already being punished, and rightfully so. However, his punishment is a matter for the proper authorities, not you or I.
As for Biblical citations, I suppose Jesus was mistaken when he said, “Judge not…” Taking your point to its logical conclusion makes Jesus wrong. For those who believe in the Biblical god—which I don’t—only he knows the hearts of people. Therefor, it’s not for us to condemn(a mainstay of Jesus’ message). But, then again, the Bible does contradict itself, doesn’t it?
The way I see it, he deserves a lot of the crow that he has to eat right now. I do agree that it ultimately isn’t our business what goes on between Ray and Janay, and that we shouldn’t ridicule them to level we’ve had. Unfortunately we dont live in a society where your privacy will be respected after a video showing you knocking a woman out is released to the public. At this point he has lost almost everything at this point, and his wife is going to ride with him throughout this so I don’t think that we should waste anymore time condemning him. Let’s let God do that while he works on redemption
As human beings, we would be living through life blindly if we did not use common sense to help guide us. We are not judging Ray Rice. People saw a video of him knocking out his, now, wife in an elevator. By calling him out on his actions, we are not judging. We are saying, “Hey, you punched your wife, and we really don’t want you to represent our city anymore.”
Religion will keep you blind for as long as you let it. Common sense doesn’t hurt anybody.
Truth
Religion no religion its not for us to call them out..they didnt ask for media help..Janay said its a private matter for them…their are plenty of other abuse relationship they can call out and use them.
What a dumb article. This is the result of gross use of marijuana
That’s a very intellectual, mature comment James. Thanks for contributing your wisdom to the conversation.
I think it may be E pills James. LOL
Just ONE question for you then. IF you say it is their life and it is PRIVATE what they do in a relationship. Do you feel the EXACT same way about Sterling getting BANNED for life from owning a basketball team, AFTER a private conversation in his own home? NOT in a public elevator, but in his HOME!
I feel like Sterling should be banned for life because of his past comments about the players he pays and because of his housing discrimination issues NOT because of something he said in the privacy of his own home. Also, what he said wasn’t racist in my opinion. I wouldn’t want my girlfriend hanging out with other dudes either. It’s unfortunate that no one has talked about how TMZ invaded his privacy.
Harvey Levin, and the people who had control over, and provided that video footage are the ones who Ray and Janay rice should go after with their displeasure. So should everyone else who still supports him. At least that’s what I would do instead of lashing out at everyone else who saw the footage, and has expressed their opinion right or wrong about it.
Everyone knows that what Ray Rice did was terrible and wrong. But when will the public realize the hurt that this poor woman will now have to endure due to social media and the press? I repeat my analogy…
A woman is raped but refuses to press charges or testify against her attacker. Why? Because she will be forced by the lawyers to relive what is likely the single most terrible moments of her life. She’ll be forced to recount the horrifying details, second by second. Imagine the mental and emotional pain and suffering that she will feel, again, and again, and again.
Well, this is what Mrs. Rice is feeling now thanks to social media and the media in general. I am making no excuse for Ray Rice, and in fact, my comments have nothing to do with him. But rather to simply and hopefully get someone to understand what she is now going through.
This is exactly my point Rob. No one is condoning what Ray Rice did but no one is also thinking about the absolute horror that Janay is going through because of the media and the public’s reaction to the video being made public. I would also make some interesting comparisons to things like reality TV which publicly displays violence among people all the time but is accepted socially as entertainment AND how the horror of the ISIS beheading, I might argue, got just as much of a response as this. I think priorities in our society might be a little mixed up. Again, just my opinion.
Fu*ck Janay. She struck him and she got knocked out. Whats the big deal.
So blame the person who committed the crime for this, not the media. If he hadn’t hit her, she wouldn’t have to live through it.
Rape victims don’t come forward because they get blamed and shamed for what happened. I see the same victim-blaming going on here. You feel bad for Ray Rice-why? He made his bed-his decisions will now affect his career.
Feel bad for her because she is an abused woman. The media didn’t make her one. Her husband did when he punched her.
she should not have married him and it will happen again once a man hits you it doesnt stop. everyone is just looking at the money even his wife. now no big pay bet they divorce
O shut this same sh*t up. Your just one of these women that needs a little bit more attention from the world thats trying to capitalize off of someone else struggle. If that woman or other women wanted your help they would have asked you. Instead you just barge your way in and mentally abuse these women and brainwash them to build a team that does more damage than helps. Why aren’t you out here playing both sides? Why don’t you speak of the physically abused men or children or animals? Thats right its perfectly fine for a female to assault a male because theres no way that she can win because she is physically smaller in size and strength. This joyride/bandwagon you and every other woman jumps on when convenient must end. Go fix the prostitution problem in the Black community, but thats right lets not talk about that because its about making money or you may get looked down on. How about some preventive measures before a girl or woman goes into a relationship. Like don’t keep pushing buttons and smacking him and talking sh*t to your mate, and then when he hauls off and stone cold knocks you out you run and jump on the DV bullsh*t.
Sorry Jackie…I must ask…are you M or F? I’m assuming female.
Thats the thing, I am who i am no matter what. Male or female I made my point. How long is the world gonna ride on domestic violence. How long will the community continue to allow the government to capitalize off pure bullsh*t?
So you can’t just answer a question? I am just curious where this perspective is coming from. I agree with what you say but just curious. I’m trying to learn here so help me out a bit.
M
This tone deaf article entirely misses the point of the outrage. There is no logic behind, “oh well these other football players and celebs have beat women worse so it’s fine.” That mentality IS the problem and talking heads using this sentiment as a talking point, thinking it’s some how a legitimate point, is nothing more than another catalyst behind the outrage. This incident is more of a straw that broke the camel’s back, and finally something people can get behind to clean house in the NFL. Anyone defending or being a devil’s advocate of Rice is either an internet troll, or a soon-to-be pariah.
Please show me ANYONE that has said anything remotely close to “it’s fine that athletes beat women.” Please…I would love to see this because I haven’t read anything that anyone has said that condone’s what Ray Rice did to Janay. Please enlighten me.
Oops…LOL…I see that Jackie basically just said it’s “No big deal.” but I think that most of everyone here doesn’t think the same way. I hope.
Why is it your problem? Why should you care? If she wants to get her ass beat thats her problem. If she likes to beat his ass then thats his problem. Its none of nobodies business except for theres. Let God deal with it. Or hell let the devil deal with it, or buddha.
The NFL has done a number on Ray. He is an extremely talented athlete with very high visibility, more so now, obviously. They are using him as a scapegoat when they should be using him as an example. Impose strict and harsh consequences with a huge fine but don’t take him out of the NFL. This is a potential PR opportunity of epic proportions for the NFL. He should not be incarcerated into the life of the general public ( we are all aware that incarceration does not equal rehabilitation) when the NFL can use him to promote programs for battered spouses. Yes, he will have to live with his mistake everyday this way but that will happen regardless. Have his wife start a foundation to heighten awareness of DV to teens and young adults! I don’t feel sorry for him one bit because what he did is deplorable but the NFL needs to take charge here and do the right thing!!! Show the children and public who hold these players in such high esteem that when you hurt someone or break the law it’s okay to get help. Use his powers for good!
We live in a world where getting caught on camera can get you arrested or make you famous. Keep your personal issues at home. It’s called being discrete. And the fact that the author brought up the income. Really? Ray will land on his feet and he’ll still make more than 90% of Americans. The NFL should be proactive and not so knee jerk reactive here.
And that’s all I have to say about that. 😃 I didn’t even know I had that much to say.
Very well said man. Very well said.
Agree. It’s the HYPOCRISY of the process that annoys me. All I kept hearing was, “Burn the witch! Burn the witch!” If video of Ben Roethlisberger’s “incident” in that bar bathroom had been available, do you think he would still be playing? To say nothing of the players you mentioned in the article. Rice has essentially been banned for life for a first offense. He should sue the league.
And all I keep hearing is we have to stop the abuse of women like Janay whilst everyone has just successfully mentally and emotionally scarred her worse then her husband did. Soooo stupid.
This article is spot and and expressed my thoughts exactly, be proud you had the courage to write this.
So let me ask this, is the proper reaction to this tape, no reaction at all? The public did not ask to see this . Should we all just turn our head and remain silent?
hell yea. move on
move on
I personally think that this is a private issue between the couple, their families, the NFL and the authorities….the video should never have been made public because the public does not have the mental capacity to PROPERLY deal with this….just make assumptions, jump to conclusions and ruin their lives before they get a chance to make a choice for themselves.
I haven’t heard that the NFL or the Baltimore Ravens were asking for the publics’ opinion before they came down on him. They made those decisions on their own. Watching that video you can only make one assumption of what happened. It wasn’t too long ago that we saw another video of Beyoncé’s sister Solange Knowles attacking Jay-Z but Jay-Z didn’t reach out and punch her.
Jessie, the public, and society, does have a say in what goes on in people’s marriages and their lives. This is why if someone stole from you, burned down your house, etc. they could still be prosecuted. It’s “the State” vs. the defendant, not John Doe vs. the defendant. It is why people can’t be married to more than one person at a time. I say that to emphasize that this isn’t about their marriage or their lives-it’s about a crime that was committed.
Another part that I think was missing from your article was that abuse affects her and taints her response. If you had ever worked with abused females, you would know this. They defend their abusers, they refuse to press charges, they make excuses for them. Her responses are very typical of what abused women say-“it was always their first time, it’s always someone else’s fault, otherwise he is a great husband/provider.” What you say that her response is the only one that matters, this would be true if he wasn’t abusing her.
We should be asking why the media and NFL went easy on the other players, not why they’re going “so tough” on Ray Rice. He hurt his marriage and career when he punched her and dragged her body for several feet.
OJ was found not guilty in court for the murder of Nicole. I assume you think the public should have not changed their opinion of him either?
Exactly Mike!!!
I will start with this, IT IS NOT OKAY FOR A MAN NOR A WOMAN TO PUT THERE HANDS ON ONE ANOTHER!! I say that because regardless of whom hit whom first, you never know what may be going through the other persons mind at the time you strike them. You never know what their mental state is at that time. It could lead to something more permanent than a black eye, it could ultimately lead to DEATH!! Second, it’s being asked why do we as the public feel that whatever happens in Ray Rice and Janay’s marriage is our business? Well my answer to that is THEY made it out business! First when he became a professional football player that not only adults, but young children and teenagers alike look up to as a role model. Second, when they decided to take their problem(s) in their marriage out into the public arena. Let’s for just a minute put to the side what happened between he and his now wife and think about all the other celebrities that we as society demonize and judge because they choose to get on stage half naked and dance provacatively. I guess because they are married and now she’s calling for their privacy, we should give them what they want. If we can demonize and judge one celebrity for one behavior then why act surprised or shocked when we as society do it to all celebrities.
I totally agree Michelle. We shouldn’t be demonizing all celebrities for certain behaviors that involve their families and I also absolutely agree Michelle that Ray Rice’s actions are absolutely forcing me to get involved in their domestic disputes. In fact, he went one step further and came to my house and forced me (at gun point) to look it up, watch the video and comment on-line regarding his marital problems. Why does our society not take responsibility for it’s part in the cycle? Are we all innocent and not doing anything wrong when we engage in this road side accident peaking.
Speaking of which, last year I rear ended a guy who slowed down and was checking out an accident on the side of the highway. The police has the balls to actually charge ME for hitting that guy when clearly it was the fault of the people who got into the accident. I mean, if they never got into the accident in the first place then I would not have rear ended that guy. I wonder why they didn’t accept my argument?
Hmmmmm???? I wonder???
I dont believe it was the first time he hit her either! What kind of human being would hit someone the first time…knock her out….and then drag her out of the elevator with a puzzled look on his face? If it was a single event, I cant help but believe after seeing he knocked her out, he would have been very concerned, bending down to see if she was ok, dead, fatally injured…something. Just another day in their life. Sad.
To be honest I had never heard of Ray Rice or his wife Janay. But when I saw the video of what he did to her in that elevator, there’s no way in hell anyone should be able to do that to another human being, let alone a woman. What has now happened to Ray Rice, being let go from the Ravens and also being banned from the NFL is something that was not voted on by the public, this came from the franchise and from the owners of the team. Does the public have an opinion about it? Of course they do, no one wants to see someone get knocked out unless you’re watching a professional boxing match. I understand sometimes people make mistakes and can learn from them, but looking at the violence of that video, who’s to say that the next time he won’t just kill her!!
God, this whole conversation is so circular and full of itself. I cannot believe that people are bemoaning the fact that “public opinion is scarring her”. She tacitly agreed to being “judged” by the public when she married a celebrity. The world over, people ALWAYS keep their eyes, ears, and tongues in the business of everyone from the local sheriff to the Queen. When you take a high profile, “celebrity” position, you ARE giving up certain rights to privacy and you know it. The incident in question happened BEFORE their marriage and yet she still married him. She was being stupid to go through with it because it has been proven generation after generation that if a man will abuse you once, he will continue to do so. She was most likely thinking only of the money. The actions taken against him will stop his multi-MILLION dollar contracts, but it will not KILL the two of them. With the money he made, they can both live comfortably for the rest of their lives and work out their problems as they see fit. However, this nonsense of “blame the public for having an opinion” is infuriating. The public is not a judge, jury, or the leadership of the NFL. The public is millions of chattering twits that all feel free to express their opinions. The first MADE these decisions… The second only voiced their feelings on the matter, nothing more. The courts/authorities do not make a final determination based on PUBLIC OPINION, they make it based on facts and laws. People seem to lose sight of the fact that he did this to himself and to her. She seems in the video to start the physical altercation herself, so she is also to blame in it. They both did themselves out of a lifetime of luxury, except that with that kind of money they can STILL invest it wisely and live more than decently for the rest of their lives. If he is banned for life, he did it to himself. If she is shamed by the whole affair, then she should ask herself very seriously why she went on and married him anyway? Victim, not victim? Greedy, not greedy? It really does not matter. They made their choices. Others are just reacting to what they see and leveling an opinion based on their perspective. She should have kept her hands to herself, and so should he. You HAVE to know that when you are a celebrity people are watching. You also HAVE to know that when you are IN PUBLIC nothing is private, even if you are a nobody. The persons so outraged by the whole thing should examine why they are outraged and then follow their hearts to do things like work against domestic violence, or perhaps (idiotic as it may seem) to work for the privacy of the celebrities in our midst. Personally, I think professional sports has been plagued by thugs and lowlifes, and it is time for all pro sports to clean house and stop accepting that their players will behave badly. It seems that honor is no longer alive and well in sports, which is much the shame. We now venerate a cadre of punks and overpaid miscreants. Such a shame…
I agree with you Jessie. whoever released the video to TMZ must be one of those people that didn’t agree with the punishment given. That person played god for a second and made his home issues worse. How is he going to provide for his family with that stigma. . Hitting a man or a woman is wrong but we do not know the full events of that night and no one stepped in to prevent this from happening. But We do know that they were drinking. How do we know she didn’t hit him first and/or say some foul stuff and he tried to warn her to stop or walk away. People need to understand that if you hit someone expect a reaction of getting hit back. NFL should not have reissued a punishment after the first decision. They had to fire him once that video came out because their money will decline and the owners can’t have that smh. With this new rule, I think other NFL players that have domestic violence charges need new punishments.
With his hefty paycheck comes a sense of loyalty and responsibility to his employer(ravens and above them the nfl). His actions represent the league and the sport as a whole. You might be upset because your favorite team doesn’t have one of there best players but he deserves everything that is coming to him. How can a man who’s job is to be as big and as strong as possible ever even think of hitting a woman. By the way he hit and treated her after he hit her, it is obvious that he is not someone worth defending. So look above your great love of football and look to the message that cases such as this presents to our society.
what he did was wrong, many people have problems in their relationship this dude just got caught. it’s the same thing as if I seen a man slapping a woman in public he’d probably lose his teeth if I’d seen it. but again look at Vick, he kicked dogs and is back to playing. taking his job? maybe little much but a suspension? hell no suspend his ass. but ray is a representation of the Ravens, if they let the shit slide then what do they look like?
killed*
This isn’t about them anymore. If you allow him to come back your giving the horrible image that as long as the female is okay being hit around it is okay. In domestic violence cases most females return to the man after the abuse happens. Does this make the abuse okay? Hell no. So please look above football and realize that in a working society these things should not be condoned. Do not let profit destroy the morality of society. Morality is much more difficult to recover than some lost profit.